Reflections

Our academic director (Storm-Ji) keeps telling us that the highs are higher and the lows are lower in India. I have to to admit that I have pretty much just been enjoying the highs of stimulation as a result of India herself. I think a lot of this is due to the very privileged upper-class experience I am getting. Everyday I take taxis (rickshaws) and not public transportation. We are staying with upper/ middle class families and rather sheltered from the difficult logistics. I feel at times I am not seeing the "real India," like I am not really making any Indian friends or doing anything other than what a privileged upper-class Indian would do. I suppose this is the program I signed up for, and I am enjoying it immensely. I suppose I am just trying to be aware of the conditions of which I am enjoying myself and how that might be coloring my perception of India. The moments which have been challenging have been familiar difficulties, such as being over charged, trying to make friends and being concerned with academics.

Being overcharged comes with being a tourist and becomes easier as I learn what correct prices are (though money always makes me nervous). I am making friends and feeling more included in the group. I made a last second decision to not go to Jaipur and instead go with everyone else to Agra to see the grand Taj Mahal. I decided that I would feel like an idiot if I didn't see the Taj after coming all the way to India, it is close to the full moon, it seemed fitting to go to the monument of love on Valentines Day, it is a friend's birthday today and I wanted to make sure I was there to celebrate, Agra is a much shorter journey than Jaipur from Delhi, there wasn't much in Jaipur itself besides an exorcism temple that really excited me, just a lot of shopping...and well in short it just felt intuitively much better to go to Agra than Jaipur. We will be leaving Saturday morning and then coming back Sunday evening.

So classes have started, and as usual I am insecure about them. I feel like I finally got to the place of feeling comfortable with Wesleyan Academics, I know how it works there and what to expect and how to manage myself. However this is a whole new set of standards (rather high actually), and criteria. I am trying to remind myself of all my friend's advice, to enjoy the place and not be concerned about work. However I find myself spending from 5-11:30 every night doing homework and still feeling rather dumb in class. Perhaps this will change, I hope so. If not, I realized that this will be the shortest academic semester ever. We JUST started classes on Tuesday, and we are done with finals on April 4th. Then we have 1 month to write 1 20 page paper. We have about 2 full weeks of excursions and one week of exams which leaves only about four weeks of classes left as of today...whoa...

I have my ISP ideas narrowed down to two: Tara and Gangotri pilgrimage. Tara would be an interesting self exploration since I could compare the compassionate Buddhist Tara and the Hindu Tara which is closer to Kali. However as of this very moment (and it changes about every 10 seconds), I am leaning towards Gangotri. I am thinking about researching the myths that take place along this pilgrimage and how they manifest in the location themselves. For example Ganesha was born in Doti Tal, the Pandavas with Draupadi followed this same route at the end of the Mahabharata for salvation, Hanuman came to a certain spot looking for the herbs to revive Rama, and in another town Ganga drowned her first seven children until her 8th she let live and he grew up to be Bhishma of the Mahabharata. I want to see how these sites acknowledge their mythic location. Is there a sign saying "this is where this happened"? Are there temples? Pieces of art that tell the story? Does the story rest only in the villagers or pilgrims minds? We'll see if this fascination stays. While many other ideas are still very interesting to me, I have to admit the idea of getting nice and fit by hiking a trek is rather appealing after eating all this amazing food all the time.

I found a Bharatnatyam teacher who is a Nationally renowned dancer. I start classes with him on Monday and I'm really excited. Yesterday Kathrine and I met Mama's nephew, and he invited us to a wedding!!! Many of our classmates are going to weddings (it is wedding season right now), and so we got sooooo excited! Next week when we get back from Agra we will be buying Saris with matching bangles, shoes and jewelry, as well as getting henna tattoos on our hands in preparation. I will be quite a hectic end of Feb. Next week we have classes again, but the week after we go to Gwalior and Orrcha to see the magnificent forts, then Khajuraho to see the temples with all the kama-sutra carvings on them and learn about tantraism. Then we go to Bandhvgarh to see the tigers! We come back on an overnight train and arrive on Feb 27th and then spend the day getting ready for the wedding!

I guess things are becoming even more normalized so there is less to report. Here are some little tidbits though. Soha (the servant in our homestay) is a really beautiful girl from Darjeeling. She is also a fantastic cook, her food is light and bursting with flavor, I keep saying I want to learn but I keep doing homework instead...this should change. She also always has the most amazing smile on her face. I realized that i really like that it is just gals living in this apartment. We spent so much time in orientation learning about cultural norms and formalities, and I feel a lot isn't applicable when there are no men present, It makes a much more comfortable and relaxing home environment. Outside however there is a man that yells periodically all afternoon. From the best Katherine and I can figure out is he goes around the neighborhood selling something, however we have never seen this guy nor been able to decipher what he is yelling, we just seem to chuckle whenever we hear him now. One strange observation...everyone's snot here is black, this is how much pollution we are constantly breathing, another reason I want to escape to the mountains for the ISP. I have just been so busy these days that I find myself just wanting to sit and do nothing, but there is just so much to do.

Thank you all for replying to me. I really do miss you, that has been far been the lowest low, not being able to regularly communicate with you. While this is an amazing experience thus far, nothing replaces spending time with you. I love hearing what you are all up to, from eating a yummy snack to watching a good movie or anything!
Much love always